When your kid is holding the keys and you are locked out!

 

When your kid is holding the keys and you are locked out!

I was hanging out with my daughter Lauren last week when one of her good friends called her to recount a horror story that had just happened. Arielle lives in New York. She had just picked up her almost 2 year old Makai from their lovely little family daycare. When they got to the car, she allowed Makai a few moments of his favorite game, ‘Makai the driver’. He was in the driver's seat, wheel in hand, pretending to drive. Arielle was next to him in the passenger seat. “Okay, all done, time to get in your car seat and let's go home.” She got out of the car, closed the door, walked around the car, and in the split second before she was able to open the other door to lift him out, he clicked the lock button. Could this even be happening? She tried coaching him from outside of the car to unlock the door, but that wasn’t successful and at some point he was done trying and dropped the keys. It was a harrowing 35 minutes for this mom before she was able to get to him. As she recounted the tale to me, she was able to identify the multitude of blessings along with the lessons from this incident. The Blessings It was NOT one of those hot New York days where a high temperature would have made all of this much more critical They were able to see and hear each other. He stayed remarkably calm, which in turn helped her stay calm. There was water and snacks within his reach. He was actually having a fine time. This was a car that required the key to start the engine. Some of the newer cars these days have a simple button that can be pushed to turn the car on. That alone would have added another level of stress! Just a few minutes into the ordeal, the daycare provider's adult son came out and tried various but unsuccessful methods for breaking into the car. Other neighbors and onlookers gathered and tried to help as people noticed the ongoing situation (this was a bit of a mixed blessing) Although her phone and car keys were in the car, she was wearing a small fanny pack that contained her AAA card. How lucky was that?! One of the neighbors finally came up with the brilliant idea to use a laser pointer. They had Makai follow the red light and try to touch it. With that little assist he was actually able to push on the necessary button and get the door open. Of course this was right as the fire truck showed up. Makai was excited that the firemen had come just for him. The Lessons Obviously the big one is that your kids should never be the only one in the car with the door closed unless you are holding the keys With her phone locked in the car, it occurred to Arielle that even if she was able to use someone elses phone, she didn’t actually know the important phone numbers. With smartphones these days, many people are in the same boat. The only phone number that she was able to easily recollect in that moment was that of her childhood best friend. Somewhat amusing but not terribly useful. If you don’t have them memorized, it is not a bad idea to have a list of important phone numbers in a handy place. Of course, if you have access to anyone else’s phone, most of your contacts are stored on the cloud these days. AAA was going to take 45 minutes to get to them even though they knew there was a child locked in the car. If it had been warm out, Mom would have started with 911, but with hindsight wishes she had called them sooner. Are there other places besides the car, where your child can lock you out? Check the locks in your house, such as the bathroom and make sure you have access in case your little one locks themselves in. When all was said and done, Makai was safe, but mom was shaken. She was feeling some guilt and shame that she had let this happen. She also played the inevitable mental gymnastics that we tend to do when a split second would have made a difference. She was oddly comforted when I initially shared, via Lauren, that by no means was she the first parent to have something like this happen. In fact a similar story had actually made it to my safety class curriculum. The safety class was largely created because of situations just like this. When I was working at Noe Valley Pediatrics, I was often the first person parents would call when their children had any type of accident, injury or safety issue. Most of the cases were fairly common such as kids falling from surfaces, or getting scalded when parents spilled their hot beverages. Because I saw the same thing over and over again, and because so many of these things were preventable, I started holding a safety class.  Every once in a while some enterprising children would shake things up and come up with ways of causing mayhem that were new and inventive. As parents called for advice I collected the tales and shared them at the classes so that other parents could learn and prevent.  One child got a gopher bite (don’t let them stick their hands down a hole in golden gate park) Another got a concussion from leaning so far over while sitting in a shopping cart that she ended up toppling the cart (always keep a hand on the shopping cart when your child is sitting in it) A small child was intrigued by the antique brooch that Aunt Josephine was wearing on her blouse. She grabbed at it and sliced her finger  (beware of jewelry with sharp points) One little one got their tongue stuck inside a Barbie dolls head (No easy advice for this one) One child got gum stuck on his eyelashes (first of all, kids shouldn’t be chewing gum until they are old enough NOT to stick it on their eyes, but believe it or not, peanut butter, coconut oil or vaseline are all options for removing it) And there it was: One child locked herself in the car. (never let them be in the car with the doors closed unless you are holding the keys in your hand) The particular incident that prompted me to add it to the safety class happened in the parking lot of Noe Valley Pediatrics. The mom and her child were there for the 15 month appointment.  Raise your hand if your child likes to play with your car keys! This mom had handed over the keys to keep the little one occupied as she gathered her purse, diaper bag etc. She got out of the car, shut the door and before she was able to open the back door, ‘click’ - she was locked out. Sound familiar? The mom involved frantically ran into the office asking for help. I remember as if it was yesterday being out there with other staff members cheering on the toddler “push that big button, no, the big one” as we saw the little toddler hit ‘lock’ over and over. A laser pointer would have been perfect!! We got in touch with dad who worked about 45 minutes south. He was on his way with the spare set of keys, when suddenly she hit the right button, the door unlocked and we got the door open before our little trouble maker could lock it again This was not the first parent to do this, and it won’t be the last. With this little cautionary tale, hopefully it won’t be you. Keeping your child safe for the first several years is akin to walking through a minefield. My safety class was not removing the mines, just giving parents a map so that they could try to avoid them. Having your child hold the keys when the doors are shut and they are alone in the car is a big ‘landmine'. Hopefully this won't happen to you now. If your little one has come up with some creative mischief that should be added to my list, I would love to hear about it! Thanks so much to Arielle for being brave enough to share her story!