Are you familiar with optical illusions?
You know the images can be seen in various ways.
A simple one includes different colored arrows. It doesn’t take too much coaching to be able to train someone to see both colors.
Another classic but more complicated one is an image of a young woman or an old crone depending on how you look at it.
If someone sees the young woman, that is their truth; you can not reasonably convince them that that image doesn’t exist. Others can only see the old crone and not for lack of trying, can not see the young woman.
Of course they both exist.
My goal has always been to recognize that there are multiple valid ways to see things and to endeavor to see both sides. Things are rarely simply black and white. There can be more than one truth.
But in this election season I am suffering. Try as I might, I completely and utterly fail to understand how so many people in this country (hopefully significantly less than half) can support a candidate who I see as completely terrifying.
With most every issue that I care about it feels like there is a right and a wrong.
Women’s rights to autonomy over their own body? (I don’t care what state you are in.)
Our climate crisis? (we are running out of time)
Common sense gun control (that many gun owners agree with.)
Freedom to marry whoever you want.
Basic democracy.
This just scratches the surface.
This election feels like it goes deeper than simple politics. There are ethics involved. It's also about standing up for those most affected by these issues, ensuring they feel heard, and, where possible, taking on some of the responsibility to help others understand these impacts.
And yet, here we are. The polls are remarkably close. How is it possible that people, some who I see as good, intelligent, caring, reasonable people somehow see things so completely differently.
I feel like I am living in an alternate universe.
If you are like me, it gets personal. For years it has been very apparent that my older sister and my opinion about most political issues are NOT aligned. It is also clear that no minds are going to be changed. But when the bickering would get heated and the claws would come out thankfully we have been able to take a breath, channel our mom, and simply agree that loving each other has to be more important than our deeply differing opinions.
This past weekend, I was at a cousin’s wedding in New England surrounded by lots of extended family. Although I believe I was in the majority when it came to politics, by no means was my sister the only one on the opposite side of the political aisle.
For the most part, everyone checked their politics at the door and celebrated being together. It can be done. The only party that counted was the one we were dancing at. In fact, not having the news on and specifically NOT talking about politics was a needed respite.
All that being said, how can we simply agree to disagree when so much is at stake? Loving someone with different views involves caring enough to engage respectfully, and if there’s even a small opening for civil, constructive discussion, it’s worth trying to share perspectives that show why these issues matter deeply. In doing so, we hold onto each other’s humanity—even when our politics diverge.
After next week, there will be millions of disappointed people (not me not me please please please.)
Being angry at people who are close to us, no matter how deeply we disagree on important manners, will not help anyone move forward.
Regardless of where you stand. Please vote and let your children see the process
Addendum: I read this post to my sister before sharing it. She gave it a thumbs up and and says it relates equally to both sides. And then….we started to argue about the issues. It got louder and louder. Did you hear us? Then we stopped and we both said “I love you”
Sigh
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